lingo

thursday. chronically blue they chose another hue with a front loaded track touched with bright and friendly lingo

#katyamills

speak and therefore exist

i let the paper fall

scarred by a sudden memory

touch the silver lotus
with a laugh from no source i

ring the cup with a 

spoon. cat with no tail 

hidden in the hedge

by the rail i am talking

to myself to know i exist

the day will give a little

like cream softens coffee

she always got somethin 

to give

#katyamills

Journal # 01.02.17

I started my day with a cadillac. Home-roasted Sumatra pour over combined with Swiss Miss dark hot chocolate. Some good music in Tycho's latest album 'Epoch'. Now seated at my desk and writing. This is where I love to be, what I love to do. I figure the more I can give myself this chance, the better off I am for you, too. I will give it my all today. Lucky #2017

finish line CIM. 2016

love. recklessly

Love your life

recklessly

like a spire 

in the air

past some meddlin 

point of 

despair

like you 

don'even 

care

Love yourself 

in the morning

all scraggled your hair

yawnin before coffee

and meds

kickin in

Love your life

 at night 

when you 

can'even 

see

 in haystacks

    drunken alleys 

and trees

 wall to wall

rolling wheels 

of cheese

 second 

to loving

no'one else

   dreamin

haunted

up to no good 

at all

in mirrors

fancy clothes

long halls

in waders

rising up

jumpers

the fish

on your

 knees

Love your life

in cups

straight up 

with no chaser

bent stemming cherries

an shaken

an stirred

collapsed 

like umbrellas

When it rains outside

the mayhem 

behind locked doors

open but screened

walled up within

thirstin for light

dreamin of pinups

and ticker tape 

parades

pregnant with life

in floods and capris

glasses and ice flashes

in the sun

rooftop flashing

the sky for a 

sign

KatYa ©2016

do not be confused

Today is your day to kick ass. Even if someone's got you imprisoned, even yourself in your own mind, but even then you can ask for a book cause that is your right. If whoever has you locked down won't let you read,  try and exploit the weakness in their rigidity, all the way to your freedom. Today is Friday and your chance to shed the skin of the past and come out all bright and shiny and new. People will notice you if you simply show up. I like to walk somewhere, under the sun, walk a mile or two and find a cafe and sit and watch and think and write. Maybe let a friend know I will be there, so they can come see me if they want. Today is your day to kick ass. Don't let social media hold you back. Get back to your sacred expression. In whatever form. Respect yourself and they will respect you, too.

If you get tired, by all means meander, online or off, but come back to yourself and your connection with what only you know and let it speak. Make that fashionable statement only you can make, whether its how you dress how you walk how you talk how you write how you sketch how you  skate how you run how you gesture how you preach how you teach how you fight how you give how you help how you see how you feel how you deal. Be you. Be free. Be real.
  - K

be the star you are the star you are the star

Let them discover you my sweetness my friend and be the star you are in this solar system holds a premium on light so all you gotta do is shine and you can but do not have to self-promote or boost or market yourself or your shining when all you gotta do is shine bright is be the star you are the star you are the star

ill see you in the light  xxo  K

Song 2016

Thanks to everyone for visiting my website
and supporting my work all year long!
I am SO grateful.

Here's a song i recorded for you...

in better times

We all came together and sang songs terribly, and had a blast, smoking and drinking and singing awfully, i swear, the fingers fumbling around the keys, too, and everytime the foot dropped there was a pause for a breath and the snow was fallin heavy outside and icicles off the eaves, and we rolled up our sleeves the laughter was work and you could feel the stretch of your smile, and smoke was rushin up the flu and water rushin down the hill, not a goddam thing kept still and fuck it all, we sure were havin the best times of our lives and no one was gonna stop us

Journal # fantastic waste of time

I believe we have the innate capacity to identify with one another, even over fantastic distances, I believe in you just as I believe in myself in that wherever you hang your lantern, you may shed light upon for us all! and nothing need be a fantastic waste of time, no, for what anyone designates a waste of time may be so for them, not me or you; and furthermore I say it is decidedly unreasonable for anyone to impose upon anyone else the proper usage of time, for to do so is not fair employment, and would be more aptly named 'slavery' unless they are paying you for your time.

 Ninety-nine of a hundred people would argue that my sitting here in the middle of the night, writing, is a waste of time, and I may be the only one who disagrees, vehemently! But you see this is all it ever takes, and this is one of the secrets to life, most of which are hidden in plain view. If you are to be anything you wanna be or become, go hang your lantern where you must, even in the darkest worlds no one else has cared to uncover, and keep your faith about you: be the fantastic waste of time everyone says you are! and be it defiantly! be it aggressively! be it nonsensically! rebelliously! be it whole-heartedly! be it consistently! and definitively!

Yes, be it from the first cup of coffee at the beginning of your day, to the bitter end. Be it on the ups, and be it on the downs. Be it before and after anyone's party. Be it in a the crowded square, and all alone in your own home. And never believe them, shut your ears and do not listen for they know not what they say.

mercurial. random. streaming from me to you

try and remember when you're feeling down, no one is getting out of here alive, and sure this may sound on the surface like a downer, but if you embrace it for a few solid moments you might see what i see,  an open invitation to live more freely, responsibly, yes, but without the snafu of collective cultural expectations of you, because nobody can touch you in the distance, and yes, we will all be forgotten someday, we will together collectively be forgotten holding hands outside of temporal confines, and the extensions of us, the children, the works of art we left behind, the spirits chasing sand dunes and leaving a hundred thousand feathers hanging in the air, black and white catching the light any time of the day and long into the night with the candles arranged just right and the memories that tried to stay conscious and the flannels that haunt central station, the scarecrows leaving straw for homeless kids to lay their heads on, the final cuts you tour behind and the cannabis in the air, the charismatic leaders and the denim on a tear, yes, remember, when you're feeling down, you know you can be loved just by loving yourself, first, and out on the scene with your paper trail bursts, killin' open mics with an subterranean method, dropping hearts to minds in your curious unique pattern, mercurial the way you are and you know that's why we love you, not hiding or disguising the honest way you feel, speaking truth to power with a power chord on fire, unplugging for some silence, for a moment off the grid where you get to hug your kid, the quiet tracks of snow have got you feeling all aglow, and you know, like i know, nothing beats this moment, i don't care what the hell they do with it, nothing beats this moment, even if we blew it, nothing could compare and no, nothing ever will, so get yourself together and meet me in Berlin, Portland, Chicago, Amsterdam, Seattle, Sacramento, Olympia, meet me cause what we have here, no one will ever see again

Journal # 03.29.15

Do not give up! Do not even think about it! In this world this madness, fast changing, leaving us with only memories and sadness, aging like we are, wondering who will be there to care anymore or remember our struggle and our little miraculous survival? Wondering what the great god has for us next.

Do not give up! Please!
No matter how tore up you are. The world needs you. We need you.
Precisely because you have been up against those odds, we need you to get even.
Come back to us. Talk to us. Help us go on another day!

Love always
Vitamin K

Journal # 02.27.15

Friday. Hope comes in funny forms. Losing the idea of a maid. Grabbing a broom and a mop. The mind fascinates when running or riding the bike. Oh the visions I have. The heart pumps harder, oxygen goes to the head. All ennui falls out the window. The sun, after a few days obscured, becomes a delight. The skin opens up its pores like a flower opens petals. Some rain in a drought may just do the same. And then the dreaded phone rings. And yes, the dreaded phone alerts. The dreaded alarm. Or the dreaded quiet, dark, descent into nightmares. No. Dear friend. This is not the end. Waking after a little hellish torment, is always so much brighter to be free. Take your bones for a walk and to dinner. Propose yourself a plan to make that dream come alive. Hold on to the blueprints, laminate them, plaster them on the walls of your mind. Then get to work. Keep the spirited sense of urgency! And when the fruits fall and are not anyone's delight? When the fruits fall and rot on the ground? There, there. This is not your concern. Keep taking sun and rain! Do not be sad for long. Let the fruits die. Another harvest is soon and sure to come! Keep giving yourself over to your passion. With urgency now, my dear, with urgency. I see you! You are a big part of this.

for once

for once
i was there!
in the middle
of my life

see before
i was brewed
i was pressed
after roasting
undressed

dirty rice
nothing nice
tousled hair
tousled life

i did not care
then. cause to care
would have flung me
headlong!

to death
by feelings

along the tattered road
of life i trudged alone
banking on fast food
and handouts

being in the mud is
not the end my
friend

the earth has
risen to ice cream creations
pounded out amorphous on the block

all the children's
glittering eyes
upon us now!

there may be
magic

what was solid
frozen in fear?
finds its way sometimes
burgeoning!
up to the air!

no need to fly
just sit on the tarmac
the blue carpet of sky
and cry

give up
like clouds
perceptibly slow

then begin to sparkle with
 all the other
shiny things
been disposed

mashed and rounded out
in the pavement

a city
bereavement
turned to glistening

reflections
all of us!
of the sun

i just wanna
get by i once
 said and
now i am here
at the center
of my life

forecast. partly sunny to breakthrough of light

Listen my friend, you will do well today to simply approach your interests, wherever you may find yourself. Your environment need not stop you today, from following your attention where it leads you. All you gotta do, my friend, is breathe in and out, carry yourself as best you know how, love yourself a little or alot, be courageous and immerse yourself in the moment. Allow for silences to fill up the room. Look anyone you want in the eye. If difficulty arises, have confidence you can bring your light into the dark places where others may very well reside, this holiday season. Immerse yourself in your felt senses, and let your intuition be your guide today. Follow your heart towards its passion, even if it is unfamiliar exploration of any given situation. Have gratitude. You are right where you oughta be, okay? Loving you today, if you cannot love yourself. You will find a way. xo - K.