draw

the will of the people cannot always 

prevail. we see this in Hong Kong even in the States 

where capitalism fights democracy

to a draw

#katyamills

post bok choy intention

the goldfish eye the

watery vision bok 

choy carried up 

on chopsticks the

distance between us

the intention to do 

no harm

#katyamills

#hk

hong kong. never too far
from my thoughts

all the action in my country
where i am caught. and you
my sister. so far, far away i write this letter
if only to say

we love you
we will not let them bring you down
may we laugh and hold hands may we
fight this together

always be free in our
hearts

tightrope.hk.leadership.manuscript

My thoughts turn to Hong Kong where democracy leaders who have fought for the ‘one country, two systems’ were recently arrested and detained. Timing is suspicious as they know the global pandemic is likely to edge out anything else (no matter how relevant) for headlines. An age old political tactic for sure. My thoughts turn also to less fortunate countries in these troubling times. Covid19 has had a terrible impact on the USA, Germany, Italy, Spain, France, UK, China. All countries with historically thriving economies, mostly well connected and funded, top notch with research and development, technological advances, and responsiveness to crisis. One can only imagine the devastation when it marches through impoverished areas. How will Africa and India and South America be impacted? I worry for the global economy and a second Great Depression. People gathering at State Capitols across the nation, protesting stay at home orders, their jobs and livelihoods at stake. And it is true that for every family every single job is not non-essential. People want desperately to get back to work. We are all walking on a tightrope it seems and for various reasons. The world needs true leadership. Who will step up? So far we’ve seen a few. Dr. Fauci. Angela Merkel. Gavin Newsom. Andrew Cuomo. Anxiety about the contagion and keeping it subdued competes with fear of the economic impact that comes from not working. I feel increasingly fortunate to have my job and my writing habit and my friends and family. Work keeps me sane. GREAT news! my manuscript is complete and ready to be published. I’m grateful for freedom of speech.   #katyamills

pandemic 2020 day 3

March 20. I have scared myself thinking i may have symptoms of covid-19. i have a history of asthma and bronchitis and have compensated for shortness of breath by long-distance running. the past couple of mornings i have felt short of breath slightly, and i have been sleeping extra hours. hopefully i'm fine. i ordered more inhalers just in case, on advice of my brother. i still cannot find a thermometer in local stores to check my temperature. the part of me that gets scared amps up and then i come to place of acceptance to calm down. so i may get the virus like anyone else, and then i just need to get through it. i have faith that i can. i have an autoimmune condition but i have kept myself in very good health and i am only 47 years old. my plan is to continue running the river and doing yoga at home to stay in good cardiovascular health. as of midnight last night the city and region of Sacramento put into force a shelter-in-place law, which can be enforced. this follows the Bay Area and SF which did so monday. a colleague told me her friend who lives in SF actually got a ticket for venturing outdoors for something other than 'essential services'. so this is martial law. Governor Gavin Newsom indicated in a letter to the President that he fears in 8 weeks time, half of the 45 million citizens of California will be infected with covid-19. This to me was an astounding statement! We have been told that the virus has stopped spreading in its epicenter, in Wuhan, China, no new cases are being reported. And they topped out at 80,000 infected. So i figured if they can stop it, why can't we? I am curious to learn more. I cannot let myself be terrified. Only curious to learn and understand and take any precautions to safeguard myself and anyone i come in contact with. The distance between two people has been set somewhere between 6-10 feet. Essential services include mostly anything you gotta do to meet your basic needs. Healthcare appointments, exercise, walking pets, grocery shopping, post office, etc. No social gatherings for leisure activities. The mayor of New York City Bill De Blasio just had a press conference and railed on President Trump for not having yet mobilized the government and 'the finest military in the world' to battle. Hospitals are going to run out of the necessary equipment in two weeks. This is the first domestic leader to really come out with a strong statement against the current administration. NYC has clearly become the new epicenter of covid-19 domestically, and it has millions of people crowded into several square miles. So the potential cost of life is extremely high.

+ a flash +

they are falling in love

they are working

they are raising the children

from south carolina

to china

the sun looks the same

the moon looks the same

from hong kong to warsaw

they worship the same gods

under different names

drink the same wine

the stars appear

no different

only the moment makes

history

the diverse feelings arise and fall

beneath the diverse flags

we come and go like

the wind

anti.escapism

When faced with our personal demons, from trauma to social anxiety to depression, insecurity, prejudice and fear, can we escape the diverse traps of escapism in a technology driven world? can we recognize when we are hiding in niche markets and pockets that insulate us from harm, the circles and titles and roles and degrees that fit our personas so comfortably well? how do we move from our comfortably numb microcosms and social media spaces into something more vulnerable and maybe terrifying? let us arm ourselves with mindfulness. let us push toward self-awareness and awareness of those around us. let us appreciate differences of opinions and perceptions, which are forged from differences of experiences. let us be curious rather than defensive. following the paths of those before us, whom we hope to emulate, whose stories provide outcome studies we can see and touch! that to be vulnerable...to step out of our comfort zones...to let ourselves go into process and come out from behind our narratives, into space where we can feel and change and grow... may we drop our guards, our personas, our designated roles for a sec...let us stand a chance at a greater authenticity. a greater connection with something bigger than ourselves, and a stronger relationship not only with our community but our society, our humanity. The outcome may prove irresistible! A greater personal sense of autonomy and spiritual freedom in an increasingly material world.

hk. we love you

i cannot turn my eyes from an honorable cause
collective awareness forever half-whole

 the internet
a consciousness blender. unevolved practices
pulled to the surface

we cannot turn our eyes we
get up at dawn to see
unsavory brutal old things hiding inside the
lobster traps while the hull rises and falls off the swells
like a breath
the waistcoat of mature regimes sweating the heart
suffering the people to a punishing
high blood pressure and panic in the
streets

hk. never give in. never
give up
our hearts beat alongside
yours

hk is special

the west and east have always been mirrors. one
sees its autonomy and corruption by the
other. sees its purity and constriction
by the other. sees its integration
in the rare and magical city
where reflections dissolve
and berlin may be
envious

hk. hong
kong

hk

we see our flags in your streets we see

   your movement like ours

could not

     cannot be 

denied

hk

love hk. 4 what will not cannot be assimilated like you love your own uniqueness. love hk

erotiKa #88

erotiKa #88
 by KatYa

not many miles of land
stand between
us

covered before long
from hong kong
with autonomy

then all unravels
in a strand of dna
plucked up from
the sand

the discovery
brazen
without age
phenomenal

comes the imminent
satiated

whip of six eyes caught
in mad uncovered
surprise

cracking inhibition
falls with silks
off thighs

caught off guard of breath
where imagining
dies

casualty of the cut of muscle
toned reality

and before long..
a great and burgeoning towards
finality

the whites of eyes
the cries