hide. they opened when asked
to lean into the demands of the day
then closed like a book of magick
in time i would learn to see by
my heart. in time to see
by the heart #katyamills
Showing posts with label eyes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label eyes. Show all posts
Tuesday, 30 August 2022
Tuesday, 29 December 2020
clueless
they can pinpoint a beetle
antennae drumming the earth
satellite imagery
immaculate coordinates
from space they alter the ecosystem
in cells driving home clueless
in mercedes they cannot locate
themselves in the body the breath
why cannot they see
with eyes?
antennae drumming the earth
satellite imagery
immaculate coordinates
from space they alter the ecosystem
in cells driving home clueless
in mercedes they cannot locate
themselves in the body the breath
why cannot they see
with eyes?
#katyamills
Friday, 8 April 2016
read me from a safe distance
i was killing someone off in my book today. in the library sitting at a table reserved for teens and no teens around just books. it was awfully quiet. i like it that way, my killing floor. nobody would suspect anything. i have been meeting more people, and they aren't turnin me off lately. i almost wanna meet another one today. very unlike me. maybe it's the weather. maybe it's because i got my hair done, my eyesight fixed, and my teeth drilled. i am about to paint my nails for the author festival on sunday. i plan to meet a lot of other murderers, i mean authors. we usually look so sweet at face value. we can take your attributes and turn you into monsters. what would happen if your families fell apart slowly? don't worry. we will put them back together. you won't look the same but you will be made of many pieces and cool to look at like a glass mosaic. it's therapeutic. can i sign that for you? you see my blood red nail polish. go somewhere and read me from a safe distance
Thursday, 24 September 2015
eyes were made for reading
My eyes have not been cooperating with me lately. The one on the right keeps getting lazy about the focus when I'm trying to read, and then does not wanna shut down when I'm trying to sleep. Then the other one likes to wander off with my thoughts sometimes, and I gotta tell my thoughts to stop wandering which is not a nice thing for a creative to have to tell their thoughts. When my left eye stays on course, he focuses really well and I can almost speed read again when I come across some boring stuff Marcel Proust had for breakfast or some lecture Dickens is giving me about child labor or the gruesome details Cormac McCarthy might serve up at anytime. I hate it when my eyes cannot keep up with my mind. But even worse is when my thoughts are lagging the sight, cause then I might see where I'm going but not be able to extricate myself from a clearly tenebrous proceeding.
Friday, 17 October 2014
erotiKa #88
not many miles of land
stand between
us
covered before long
from hong kong
with autonomy
then all unravels
in a strand of dna
plucked up from
the sand
the discovery
brazen
without age
phenomenal
comes the imminent
satiated
whip of six eyes caught
in mad uncovered
surprise
cracking inhibition
falls with silks
off thighs
caught off guard of breath
where imagining
dies
casualty of the cut of muscle
toned reality
and before long..
a great and burgeoning towards
finality
the whites of eyes
the cries
stand between
us
covered before long
from hong kong
with autonomy
then all unravels
in a strand of dna
plucked up from
the sand
the discovery
brazen
without age
phenomenal
comes the imminent
satiated
whip of six eyes caught
in mad uncovered
surprise
cracking inhibition
falls with silks
off thighs
caught off guard of breath
where imagining
dies
casualty of the cut of muscle
toned reality
and before long..
a great and burgeoning towards
finality
the whites of eyes
the cries
Thursday, 10 July 2014
eyes
my eyes were once innocent
now they are hard
full of what they saw
on these city streets
my eyes were once innocent
then full of confusion
my eyes were confused
angry and young
and scared
my eyes
they were scared
now they are hard
like these city streets
my eyes
they are hard
but they soften
my eyes
my eyes
they soften
around truth
Saturday, 8 March 2014
uncover
Uncover your heart
one thousand words
one day
ascertain a movement
beneath the jabbering
fear
when all is really silent
a most delectable sound
to hear
stop the social media
for one minute
every hour
drop your fuckin cell phone
from atop the cell phone
tower
pull the plug
for life!
a blackout on this city
the darkest night
one moment
have faith!
have trust!
the eyes adjust
Saturday, 21 September 2013
the story of the friend with the generous aperture eyes
There was an established community. Peace reigned throughout the system in place (or so it appeared). Those in places of power, had been voted on and secured by a fair and democratic process -- with the usual parade of accepted or derided acts of nepotism. Nepotism, after all, must be thoughtfully handled as though it were a fine art. Thoughtless public displays of power-grabbing would be exposed in a discrediting way. Still, in this community, those who had most blood relatives, tended to see the longer end of every stick. As was the way of the greater world, surrounding.
Peace prevailed for a long enough time, to cause anything other than peace to be drawn into immediate attention. The peaceful nature of the inhabitants, smoothed over any rough edges almost immediately. Like the sea turning broken bottles into sea glass. Not just anyone, wanted to see a real and heavy kinda violence erupt upon the stage. Everyone kept such a feeling to themselves, for fear of alienation.
In this peaceful community with its subtext of potential violence, a seed germinated. Among them was one who had no ties with anyone whatsoever. One who came from out of any context of time, place, or family tree. There were rumors, of course, about how it came to pass that a stranger had stepped into the family portrait from off the edge of the map, but due to the pacific nature at hand, no one took the bull by the horns, as they say.
This one, this stranger, had wide eyes and was identifiable sight seen, due to their inner light pouring out in generous fashion, in yellows and earth tones, to light up anyone's world who stood within twenty feet. The rumors gave way and were extinguished by the light. This one became immediately well-liked, despite their forays into psychoses still unestablished.
Most would be shocked when they found out about the true hidden nature of their so-called friend; the one with the generous aperture eyes.
Nobody would ever place the generosity in question. You see, they basked in the inner light pouring out upon them. Like a waterfall of light pooling into the public square. With a twenty foot circumference the kids inside only stepped out of, on a dare. Your average inhabitant felt warm enough to shed back some body armour, and lay down before this. Some would go further, and perhaps even show an unrefined vulnerability to the one with the generous aperture eyes.
Bad idea. Everybody knows you don't get the Led out! and go Houses of the Holy cover art on some dude you barely met! That's like some chick texting her tits to some recently paroled, domestic abuse artist. Which for all anybody knew, this one was or could have been! But the light, the light, everyone talked about the sweet generous light! No one doubted the fact that the one cast no shadow at all. And spoke not a word to a soul. And lived on yogurt pretzels and hot-dog flavored potato chips...and slurpees.
But it happened, nevertheless. That subtext thing that everyone secretly wanted. And thank God no one got hurt. Maybe feelings. But feelings can feel their way out of a hurt. Usually.
So this propped up, phony, cult-of-personality fell down off the life-drawn dream rendition, when the community's resident genetic profiler (and a highly intelligent man) got wind of the newcomer with the generous aperture eyes. The analytics were not compelling. Not towards the ever-coveted passport stamp of membership, after all.
Why did it take so long? Well, prepare to laugh or cry. The second child of the third sister of the wife of the man who was the son of the son of the founder, or the purported co-founder of our beloved community, you know, the one who utimately branched off to an unknown location deep in the valley, where the few who went with him were tricked into his harem? Ya, that one! Well, his grandson's wife's third sister's second child totally dropped the ball as the Chief Minister of Immigration aka Border Patrol. Having been absolutely gifted (as a favor to the first and second sister, whose sister (the third sister) was distraught over the brutish ennui demonstrated by her second child, after the untimely passing of her husband and first son in a tragic crowdsourcing accident that no one has ever been allowed to discuss since it happened) the position and title in the community, in the most intricate act of nepotism since the first brother (and known gambler) of the daughter of the very same founder was elected Treasurer of the community. Then stoned to death. After he usurped half the bank one year, and lost it in Reno. Long before peace settled over the community.
So the genetic profiler (a highly intelligent man) had words with the good-for-nothing Chief Minister of Immigration, and gave a compelling case for extradition. He received such a larceny of honest discourse, in reply. Yes-man type responses, and nods of the head, inside of which no wheels were in motion whatsoever, at all! The subsequent call for action against the one with the aperture eyes, was so long delayed, there were at least a half dozen citizens who had grown their first gray and silver hairs, in the same span of time.
But how could such a peaceable community, so violently impose extradition upon a person who had babysat half the community's children in a strange circle of light, all these years it took for at least half a dozen citizens to grow their first gray and silver hair? But what evidence could possibly have discredited the seemingly benevolent strange being who came out of nowhere? With such generosity of light and spirit as had so endeared our friend with the aperture eyes, to the people? Flowing out in every direction to the distance of twenty feet?
Well, legend has it the resident genetic profiler (the same highly intelligent inhabitant of the community who demanded a call for extradition), had a scientific dossier of his findings; which moved quickly from hypothesis to theory, and withstood all lack of challenge in the community. The findings in said dossier (which have been sealed in an open air wicker basket atop a file cabinet in the living room of our beloved Chief Minister of Immigration) pointed to either a genetic or nurtured flaw in the disposition of the optical system presenting in the subject, the one with the generous aperture eyes. Therefore, it concluded, the generosity of the aperture disposition in the optical system was a direct result (and by no means chosen by the subject) of an involuntary perforated retina. Possibly inherited from unknown predecessors. But more than likely from the television ozone leaking through the ocular atmosphere, at some point in the subject's past life of apparent fraudulent and highly suspect life of suspected couch surfing, and transient living.
An addendum to the findings, which since has been lost by you know who, suggested also that the reason for the subject's apparent chosen life of silence and involuntary light-distribution to a radius of twenty feet around, was due to a nesting of evil behind the eyes, rather than the suspected life of asceticism. And went on to propose that said subject likely had no soul, anymore, if it ever had one to begin with. Without a genogram in place, there could be no knowing. Interrogation of the subject was quickly ruled out. The children attracted into the light, were simply as comfortable as they would be seated in front of the television, at any time or location, as was also demonstrated by the resident genius in his own use of variables and constants to replicate the situation, for purpose of moving hypothesis into theory, in his laboratory, and then appropriately calling for action and extradition. Such is the scientific method, applied. At least get your kids out of there!! he whispered to his friends' wives, long before the experiments were even conducted.
And so, after many a grey hair had grown, the formerly peaceable community quite violently extradited the one with the generous aperture eyes, out back to wherever it came from. And so it hovered, its light spilling out on over, the edges of the community that once had embraced it.What happened next is quite tragic, indeed. After being eighty-sixed from the system and having all its permissions revoked...well, you can only imagine! Those big doe eyes turned red as sweet peppers from safeway, baby, and our former friend with the mistakenly attributed aperture eyes, flew into a psychotic rage which surrounding communities all talk about to this day, coming across the land like some bat-out-of-hell. The formerly peaceable community was entirely enveloped, in violent reaction. The end.
Peace prevailed for a long enough time, to cause anything other than peace to be drawn into immediate attention. The peaceful nature of the inhabitants, smoothed over any rough edges almost immediately. Like the sea turning broken bottles into sea glass. Not just anyone, wanted to see a real and heavy kinda violence erupt upon the stage. Everyone kept such a feeling to themselves, for fear of alienation.
In this peaceful community with its subtext of potential violence, a seed germinated. Among them was one who had no ties with anyone whatsoever. One who came from out of any context of time, place, or family tree. There were rumors, of course, about how it came to pass that a stranger had stepped into the family portrait from off the edge of the map, but due to the pacific nature at hand, no one took the bull by the horns, as they say.
This one, this stranger, had wide eyes and was identifiable sight seen, due to their inner light pouring out in generous fashion, in yellows and earth tones, to light up anyone's world who stood within twenty feet. The rumors gave way and were extinguished by the light. This one became immediately well-liked, despite their forays into psychoses still unestablished.
Most would be shocked when they found out about the true hidden nature of their so-called friend; the one with the generous aperture eyes.
Nobody would ever place the generosity in question. You see, they basked in the inner light pouring out upon them. Like a waterfall of light pooling into the public square. With a twenty foot circumference the kids inside only stepped out of, on a dare. Your average inhabitant felt warm enough to shed back some body armour, and lay down before this. Some would go further, and perhaps even show an unrefined vulnerability to the one with the generous aperture eyes.
Bad idea. Everybody knows you don't get the Led out! and go Houses of the Holy cover art on some dude you barely met! That's like some chick texting her tits to some recently paroled, domestic abuse artist. Which for all anybody knew, this one was or could have been! But the light, the light, everyone talked about the sweet generous light! No one doubted the fact that the one cast no shadow at all. And spoke not a word to a soul. And lived on yogurt pretzels and hot-dog flavored potato chips...and slurpees.
But it happened, nevertheless. That subtext thing that everyone secretly wanted. And thank God no one got hurt. Maybe feelings. But feelings can feel their way out of a hurt. Usually.
So this propped up, phony, cult-of-personality fell down off the life-drawn dream rendition, when the community's resident genetic profiler (and a highly intelligent man) got wind of the newcomer with the generous aperture eyes. The analytics were not compelling. Not towards the ever-coveted passport stamp of membership, after all.
Why did it take so long? Well, prepare to laugh or cry. The second child of the third sister of the wife of the man who was the son of the son of the founder, or the purported co-founder of our beloved community, you know, the one who utimately branched off to an unknown location deep in the valley, where the few who went with him were tricked into his harem? Ya, that one! Well, his grandson's wife's third sister's second child totally dropped the ball as the Chief Minister of Immigration aka Border Patrol. Having been absolutely gifted (as a favor to the first and second sister, whose sister (the third sister) was distraught over the brutish ennui demonstrated by her second child, after the untimely passing of her husband and first son in a tragic crowdsourcing accident that no one has ever been allowed to discuss since it happened) the position and title in the community, in the most intricate act of nepotism since the first brother (and known gambler) of the daughter of the very same founder was elected Treasurer of the community. Then stoned to death. After he usurped half the bank one year, and lost it in Reno. Long before peace settled over the community.
So the genetic profiler (a highly intelligent man) had words with the good-for-nothing Chief Minister of Immigration, and gave a compelling case for extradition. He received such a larceny of honest discourse, in reply. Yes-man type responses, and nods of the head, inside of which no wheels were in motion whatsoever, at all! The subsequent call for action against the one with the aperture eyes, was so long delayed, there were at least a half dozen citizens who had grown their first gray and silver hairs, in the same span of time.
But how could such a peaceable community, so violently impose extradition upon a person who had babysat half the community's children in a strange circle of light, all these years it took for at least half a dozen citizens to grow their first gray and silver hair? But what evidence could possibly have discredited the seemingly benevolent strange being who came out of nowhere? With such generosity of light and spirit as had so endeared our friend with the aperture eyes, to the people? Flowing out in every direction to the distance of twenty feet?
Well, legend has it the resident genetic profiler (the same highly intelligent inhabitant of the community who demanded a call for extradition), had a scientific dossier of his findings; which moved quickly from hypothesis to theory, and withstood all lack of challenge in the community. The findings in said dossier (which have been sealed in an open air wicker basket atop a file cabinet in the living room of our beloved Chief Minister of Immigration) pointed to either a genetic or nurtured flaw in the disposition of the optical system presenting in the subject, the one with the generous aperture eyes. Therefore, it concluded, the generosity of the aperture disposition in the optical system was a direct result (and by no means chosen by the subject) of an involuntary perforated retina. Possibly inherited from unknown predecessors. But more than likely from the television ozone leaking through the ocular atmosphere, at some point in the subject's past life of apparent fraudulent and highly suspect life of suspected couch surfing, and transient living.
An addendum to the findings, which since has been lost by you know who, suggested also that the reason for the subject's apparent chosen life of silence and involuntary light-distribution to a radius of twenty feet around, was due to a nesting of evil behind the eyes, rather than the suspected life of asceticism. And went on to propose that said subject likely had no soul, anymore, if it ever had one to begin with. Without a genogram in place, there could be no knowing. Interrogation of the subject was quickly ruled out. The children attracted into the light, were simply as comfortable as they would be seated in front of the television, at any time or location, as was also demonstrated by the resident genius in his own use of variables and constants to replicate the situation, for purpose of moving hypothesis into theory, in his laboratory, and then appropriately calling for action and extradition. Such is the scientific method, applied. At least get your kids out of there!! he whispered to his friends' wives, long before the experiments were even conducted.
And so, after many a grey hair had grown, the formerly peaceable community quite violently extradited the one with the generous aperture eyes, out back to wherever it came from. And so it hovered, its light spilling out on over, the edges of the community that once had embraced it.What happened next is quite tragic, indeed. After being eighty-sixed from the system and having all its permissions revoked...well, you can only imagine! Those big doe eyes turned red as sweet peppers from safeway, baby, and our former friend with the mistakenly attributed aperture eyes, flew into a psychotic rage which surrounding communities all talk about to this day, coming across the land like some bat-out-of-hell. The formerly peaceable community was entirely enveloped, in violent reaction. The end.
Sunday, 30 June 2013
Rolling Allostasis -xi)
She was as unsuspecting as I had been in my third decade. She spaced on budgeting (heat and ac) in her summer heavy, winter heavy, urban gps. Her chakras registered (like christmas lights) the previously unappreciated, suddenly luxury shit, as artificial temperature adjustment. Her eyes gleamed silver. Hammered steel.
She came out of March half frozen, only to suffer in June (and beyond) perpetual dehydration as humidity crept up to a resting allostasis. Right before everyone and everything got really fuckin wet.
The truth dripped around out there, making puddles. Only to be splashed out of reach, again. Reflecting hammered steel.
She saw herself in reflection. She suffered, and by her suffering became more intimately connected with her reality. This time. Others would have to suffer more, to digest the whole raw deal.
I liked this about her. She countenanced truth. Yeah, she gave the world the middle finger sometimes. The warrior in her clawed eyes out. She knew. Truth need not eyes, to see.
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