Showing posts with label personal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personal. Show all posts

Saturday, 16 June 2018

what was given us

the colorless moments of stressed inhibition. must i be always backed into a corner before i come fighting? a sea of bad news and brake lights ahead. even tears and smiles were a stretch.

then, from that place of half flag summer fatigue, arose a current from the far east. we would not know until we opened two walls. the windows.

life came into the trees. i awoke feeling different. all the colors returned. time was no longer just a waiting for work. there was meaning and it was personal. it was yours. it was mine.

Friday, 20 March 2015

Journal # 03.20.15

I confess I hate T.S. Eliot for 'the Wasteland' . Now maybe the authorities will arrest me and throw me in jail with my stale jaundiced copy of Catcher In The Rye and my fuck you attitude toward the literary intelligentsia from the owner of city lights on down. I will not have my voice dismissed by a small faction of ivy-wrapped literature class tenure-burdened, ass pale from kisses, Madames and Misses. No way. Yes, Amazon is a jungle and a corporate monster with baby robots shuffling fulfillment orders through warehouses the size of Leichtenstein . But it was also founded as an online bookstore out of the garage of a man named Bezos in Bellevue, Washington. In 1996, a time when corporate bookstores had already begun mercilessly destroying the unique landscape of mom and pops in cities all across America. Now those corporate bookstores are getting their karma by Amazon putting them out of business. You can buy a book for a lot less money on Amazon. Of course, no one will ever come to consensus agreement on anything. Authors complain the price points on their books have been obliterated. Well, so what. I am an author and have gotten used to not making a living, writing. Still, I know I have a chance, just continuing to place quality product out there in the jungle. Because there are lots of kids with e-readers looking for something worth reading. I was in Chicago in 1996 when Amazon was still called 'cadabra.com' in its infancy. I lived in an apartment on top of a tiny bookstore owned and run by a holdout and alcoholic. He had inherited the business from his father, and was still pushing hardcovers out on the sidewalk every morning and talking to anyone and me about literature. Those days are mostly gone, though any good American city still has its holdouts and used booksellers. They might be a little worn for wear and even hard to talk to, what with the bitterness comes of draining an abscess. Still, I find it a joy to go in there and tell them I hate the fucking Wasteland and watch their eyes turn red on me. We can always come back in the end to smiles, in our mutual admiration society of  our beloved Catchers In the Rye.

Thursday, 5 June 2014

Atlantis. Times Three.

Poetry from K IS SILENT
written and performed by Katya Mills




Atlantis, times three


i am trying to find myself

between commercials

apparently

i am located

somewhere deeper

than that

Atlantis

times three

i remember almost dying

the weight

was too great

i got

stepped on

like flagstones

I saw you there

we could touch

almost

through our

imperial pints

of tears

drowning

Atlantis

times three

i got stripped

like a stripper

but without

so much

a choice

off the walls

in the paint

in the darkness

the memory

faint

gracefully

i laced up

to give them

something

2 remember

gracefully

i tried then

2 forget

sometimes

i grabbed the knives

in the kitchen

and turned

toward them

screaming

its real painful

to look

i could drown

in it

Atlantis

times three

i found me

by looking

baptized

by watercolor

bled down

in the city

bled out

to the valley

sweet canvas

of colors

shelters me now

the painted walls

i like to

leave them

this way

i am different

i am young

my spirit

touched by

the sound

of the colors

dripping down

Atlantis

times three

is where

i am found