dizzy

thoughts. sift through them for the ones will give you strength to face another day. the venom from traumas is pure and lethal. 😵 when dizzy you can sometimes dance but not always

bloom

get up and say a prayer. drag these 50 year bones to the kitchen. pull the bag of beans out of the freezer and and grind them by hand while the tea kettle fires water to a boil. memories begin to percolate in my styled bed head. the whistle. the first splash into the ceramic cone lined with filter is to let her bloom over the mason jar. the thoughts are beginning to breathe. images of new england and chicago and the road between them. clockwise over the grounds and feelings are bubbling up now. long slow exhalations. it's between four thirty and five. the frothy brown liquid is ready. deep blue yosemite mug. pull my hood over my head, open the sliding glass door and walk out into the dawn. i have to leave the past behind or it will kill me. just listen to the morning birds. just watch the sky fill with light. #katyamills

give a fuck

a long sleep 

followed a terrible apathy

woke up off a few shots 

of espresso and la crema 

d'italia

promised myself 

once i recovered 

gonna give a goddamn 

galaxy of fucks

today

#katyamills

melon

a great rain gave the land muscle

you could see it

squeezed into the grapes 

on the vines braided tight across the land

the sun made the bodies tearful

green rind rockers

a memory of watermelon

an artillery of seeds

shot out of the mouths of

boys

#katyamills

n.one

all the broken hearts
came together to make one
with chips and holes and cracks
drippin blood from the edges
auctioned off at Christies
to a soul who had
none

#katyamills

afterlife

all this stuff won't be useful 

to you he says. not after you're dead and gone

i saw through and hung on tight 

his aim clearly to separate 

me from it. for i was young and nowhere

near the after life

#katyamills

distraction

the vision idled

distraction stuck a knife in us 

the vision watched us like house plants

rooted in the here and now

needing to be 

watered

#katyamills