restructuring your conditions

I made some changes in my conditions to try and maximize the possibility for continuing to write books. Don't get me wrong, I love my life and my routine. But something was off, and consequentially I've seen a frightening drop in sustained creative output the last couple of months. I can flash here and flash there, keeping up my daily blogging and youtubing, but there is a price to pay for this kinda work. You get used to bouncing around the internet! Which I find not so conducive to the long form, or the conditions necessary for writing books. Many will say (and I have told myself) it's as easy as clicking on the 'do not disturb' protocol (on your devices) and making personal space for yourself. And maybe it is. But bloggers have a responsibility to their audience that the Ralph Waldo Emersons and Henry David Thoreaus of the world have not! Anyway, I decided to make some changes. I stepped away from the internet for several days and stepped outdoors. I drove out of town and did some things differently than usual. This coincides with a vacation from my nine to fiver. I eased up on the coffee. I caught up on my sleep (a real deficit I was running) and reconnected with some people and creatures (mostly cats) I care about, on a deeper level. I stopped reading and listening to the news. I need to make a conscious push towards the lighter things of life, laughter and learning and shared, hopeful perspectives. I tend to let myself go toward darkness, I realize, it's easier to be jaded. Now I am rediscovering how it feels to wake up in the morning, make some coffee, and sit down at my desk in silence and write my book. It was only a few months back when I was doing this, but it coulda been forever ago.

how to be alone

I would be happy to live out my days as a recluse. I think it would be pretty fun. I could do all sorts of scientific experiments. Study up on Thoreau. I'm only gonna have one food group a day. I will start with starches, mashed potatoes, and then move to tomatoes, and if there are leftover tomatoes I will find a skunk and spray another animal so I can use them for a tomato bath. Then they will owe me a wonderful debt of gratitude. The animals will become my little helpers. If there are leftover potatoes I will post them for a lookout, take advantage of all those eyes. I hate how they look at me before I beat them with the masher. When I am filled with guilt I can sit by the stagnant pond and write a treatise on human nature. Find a swell theory to overcome my remorse. You are not what you do, your actions do not define you. Oh! If I can realize one of my shelved dreams and colonize the famous lac bug, I will study and write a book about proper usage of shellaq for dyeing winter wools for sweaters. I will call it Shellacrilage. Hopefully my animals will be agreeable to lending their winter coats for testing dyes, though it might confuse the foxes when the badgers all turn red.