Showing posts with label mother. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mother. Show all posts

Tuesday, 18 October 2022

like a stranger

yes 

you burned me again

reigniting the past through your dirty broken 

magnifying lens


hurt

i turned away from this nonsense

and toward my aunt whom you told me

in the same breath

died


harboring the question

have you no heart? 


to me

you are like

a stranger


#katyamills

Wednesday, 10 February 2016

Maze 2:11:3 Storytelling

Book Two
Chapter 11
Part 3

In the last episode 2:11:2 Maze and his mom, well, the distance between them was growing. Consider them divided by headphones and the sound of Pantera or Disturbed. Consider a wedge of court tv and Highway to Heaven reruns. But really, that's not even half the distance.


Wednesday, 12 August 2015

memory # sun light strike

I remember my mom cutting my hair when I was a little kid with the same scissors we used to cut out shapes from colored paper,  long with a colorful plastic handle it made a funny sound like a metal cricket when its two sharpened legs came together, one of them cold resting against my forehead to steady her hand, the high-pitched shwee-sh-wooo, and the air in the autumn smelled of crunchy dead leaves, the smoke from the chimneys came across in the breeze, and my eyes wanted to look around cause we were outside, seated on a stool on the porch my dad built, the door behind us painted a bright cherry red when all the adrenaline rushed to my head as the cricket danced across my face, and my mom's hands loving but firm taking hair up between her fingers and licking it to make an end, like a stamp for a letter to a friend, shwee-sh-wooo, then stepping back to check her work and guiding my big head in her hands, eggs and bacon on the breeze coming off the neighbor's trees, the sound of distant lawnmowers and some petrol I can taste as she cuts behind my ears and my face, shwee-sh-wooo, and presses a thumb behind my ear, and her other hand cupping my head, saying hold still! in a firm but even tone, the old school ringing of the phone behind the door, shwee-sh-wooo, getting impatient saying sit up some more so I scoot up in the chair and try to hold myself there, but the colors of the morning and the itching of the hair, have my head following my eyes, and the metal crickets almost cut me, hold still! - I thought I was - and the now she's working on the fuzz on the nape of my neck, shwee-sh-wooo, the goosebumps come up and I giggle feeling chills, and my mom's got her allergies on her allergy pills, maybe hungover from the night before and the mischief we made, my brother and I in the night feeling brave, tiptoeing up to the attic on steps all of which creaked to play air hockey or just watch tv in the dark, feeling adventurous quite high on the lark, shwee-sh-wooo, and now I am hoping it will be over very soon, as my keeper is not happy i'm afraid, leaning into me smelling of dad's cologne and perfume, shwee-sh-wooo she pulls at my hair and shouting hold still! the tone of her voice demanding and shrill, and I picture my ear cut off on the boards, bleeding down into the planks on the porch dripping down into the ground in the soil, to sprout in the dark some ears on a vine, and then i will pick one to best replace mine, and though there is forceful aggressive hedging going on, I still cannot repress a long sigh and a yawn, for I know I am safe at my sweet mother's behest, soon in her loving arms will I rest with her fingers running through the blonde wave she has made, all the ends misplaced and bangs askew I'm afraid, but who knows and who knew and who cares I could say, lucky and kept in a rough-loving way.

Tuesday, 4 August 2015

lilac and hues. and drops

I painted my nails lilac and went out to say hello to the sycamore trees and the killer bees, and when I touched the sky, the paint proceeded from my fingertips to join the morning hues, creating a colorful pageantry of blues, inside of which found my eyes blinking half the time, dropping salt and water and searching for my daughter in the clouds. I wondered why the flags were half mast today in California, and I don't really wanna know. I listened to some jazz and got a real good rhythm for my spirit, all I had to do was hear it beyond the usual channels superficial on the land, to the deep sea ones carved beyond the hands of man. Arthritis in one finger reminded me I will never be all right, and the essence of my imperfection helped me sleep last night with one cat curled up around my calf, the other making an orange drop upon the blanket. Gore Vidal was in my dreams, up there with the gods and fighting with his mother. She wasn't happy with his books, you see. Drunk as usual.

Monday, 11 August 2014

INSTRUMENTAL # 1

F & K original
Acoustic Guitar 
Instrumentals

Music Composed and Performed by K Mills
Inspired by F Ramon's poem: 'in the time of tomato blossoms'
dedicated to the memory of his mother



'in the time of tomato blossoms'
by Frank Ramon

this old heart is missing you
last saw you in the Fall
those times lie down
like leaves in winter
whose rains have watered
seeds of Spring

lay me down now
the fires growin dim
daylight approachin
darkness fades again
each tear i shed
what seeds will water

i look North 
to where i lost ya

are you still there?