Thursday 29 April 2010

when they tell u 'fuck u' you know they just hit you with the predicate

Fuck you! was her status quo response to alot of people in the past 6 months. She was angry, this brunette skinny leg low rise wearing queen who you would still want to meet if you were a guy, why? cause you love the way her blood circulates, the way her energy flows, breaking up the frozen river to your heart, creating various ice floes? cause of the way she comes up to kiss you and comes up on her toes?

fuck you... no wait! thats what he wants, she thought, simmering as she thought it. these guys these guys, when you let them part your thighs. whats wrong with you girl? you jus trying get a rise? yes, yes, you are. lets be honest. give it up. they are right, it is true. tonight im headed to to work them, work them all. tonight in my garter, tonight at the pool hall.

Not forever! fuck no! After having met the man her very jesus, all colors went pale, all voices went cold. She could have swore he was the savior, in modern day times. She knew the second coming would not be obvious or outdated, nor dressed to the nines. He was minimal, calm, wearing white, hanging with anyone, blind to class, non-judgmental...and denied nothing, held silence. Smoked cloves. She sized them up quick, this was part of her skill. The trauma she suffered fueled her vigilance, not her will.

She listened to her one and only savior, in extraordinary spirits and unusually mild-mannered; could be dubbed a miracle relative to her typical misbehavior. she promised she would go chaste before she went mental. he said he would throw a parade... (they both knew it wouldn't last, yet he treated her gentle).

heels so high, she's destined for a fall!  everyone could see this, found her sad, base, demeaning, off-balance. the shorter guys would gather close, in hopes to receive her overcompensatory twins at eye level. She stuffed them somewhere in between her and them, mad as hell, ears ringing. Before she would enter the motel room known as hers, she shouted just a sec! to buy herself a few minutes. as she headed back to back rooms unidentified, where her mother not from birth looked her up and down...sighed.

fuck you! came her venom, residual to her chat with her pseudo-mom generic (better than the original, not so ignorant, more fun). all flourescent quality vibrational molecules could be cherished as they rained down up him from the balcony of the motel. Getting spit at by her may be least desired, but still he thought about it with his (characteristic) unrealistic kind of denial; as a connectionWhat for him was hard-wired. To most was plain weird.

 The kind of guy who fails to comfort the desperate. Left her anxious and pissed, not that she knew different, when a trick tries to create some sick, concocted position. she once implored him for help to pay for dentures when her teeth hit the hygiene basement: enamel crack defacement. No dentures no flossing! You may blow me more often! see hes not worth it! she yelled to herself critically. What did you expect? he would forfeit?

The reference you may know, was to seven card poker; his favorite game, second only to Pin the Tail on the Choker. All which coalesced very nicely with our heroine borderline. Ya, the one who had some men breathing for her within a three hour acquaintance. The one who stopped his breath. Who kept his heart from frozen death. He could care less of his heart, he could care. Asked stanford surgeons to replace it with a pump, if they could. He could pay six digits was his offer...three weeks later the offer still stood.

She lost her patience and went mental, our tragic antigone. Ran away to Hollywood, then Vegas, then Hong Kong. Took pain pill generics to partial effect. Kept the cast waiting on many a porn set. Doing her K lines in some palace of brine;  up in her head, things were fine fine fine....when truly she had given all the men all she had...had left her half of half-dead; underwhelmed, oversalted and unfed.

Kept company of one eyed jacks gone wild, token chain newport smokers, toward the end, out in Reno. they played well into the previous night, or so they said, what they know. Somebody probably dipped into deeper deep pockets. She was purported to have pawned a silver locket. Tumbleweeds tumbled round the edge of old Reno. Forecast was the usual, dry as a bone, the day she went missing; a tip called in by payphone. the receiver hung in the wind, looking defeated, when found. anxious drunks hung about similar, lost in their bottles and unsettled loans...With what teeth? what mortgage? with what home, what home?!

Wednesday 28 April 2010

the way (over a full moon)

No essentially negative phenomena existed there, in the vast nebula which made the core of her thoughts. All trace of bitter toxic element was calmy spun toward perimeter. All was then softly jettisoned via the osmotic membrane. Into diffuse and endless galaxy...

Where such interminable emptiness and she left off, no one could say

The time was contextual, thoroughly understood, and could neither provoke fear nor worry in the heart of her people, of this long survived tribe of those sentients indigenous to la terre haute... indigenous to more than simple earth element...native also to loyal stubborness....to speaking the truth even if the truth refused to be spoken

In such moments, circled around the fire element, one who wore representation of this remarkable tribe would embrace his moment of contribution to suggest in tarnished paucity of tongue that such was true

Meaning the fog hid the vision
Meaning truth was hiding
Meaning they were seeking
Possibly desiring
Or even craving
Like waves
cresting

To touch the whole
full
moon


http://www.phillipscollection.org/research/american_art/artwork/Dove-Me_Moon.htm


The women were often silent around the fire
Mostly by choice
Interspersed among the men
They knew their place
had their voice

They took the careful mix of seasonal berries
hand picked off the bushes
in vast fields around them
by their children
close to dawn

They blessed then bled them out
Colorfully into brass bowls
saved for ritual

Then when the embers
of wood and water
were all thats left of fire
made by boys and men
they loved

The desire named earlier
for truth to form vision,
lost its frustration
saw resurgence
via alchemy

Compassion manifest
in waves around the circle
From center
rippling out...

Silently uplifting
the spirits of her people
Nothing she knew
could ever have equal

The young women moved with grace around the circle. They received the brass bowls filled to spill, morning harvest of fruit. Each held a secret recipe of color, drawn by auras colliding. To trust intuition was part of arriving. Yes they were chosen. Yet this was not planned. More subtle...

No one knowing

With mystery came the magic! The madness! the bubbling froth of mad river flowing.
How then was the choosing of chosen? What was the procedure, the manner, the technique? Such questions kept arising from those still asleep

By one knowing...
 An inside job really....
Mindful of energy...
self-aware...

These all could be answers to the questions
the hangups
the disconnections

the suffering

But rather than answer in such a coarse fashion, she
like her people
carried out the way as the way carried her.
She let her heart open as she painted the skin
of the man stood before her...

with fingertips she brushed him
with blue & straw berry essence

the patterns, the spirals
came out of shared vision
decisively rendered
like she had a mission

They smiled with the innocence
of those who are lovers


Her tribe
the whole lot of them
toward the same moon

up above us

Tuesday 27 April 2010

urban verse #1

with faith in life
and in one another
we began to fall in love
when we took cover
went underground again
found & got synched

under the cover
of darkness
 he was my lover
of light

hitting the bricks
in the early hours
of the day
tricking the tricks
what they gonna say?

about the 9-5
spent half in his arms
felt so alive

footprints above our heads
steam beneath our feet
remarkable natural flow
when we kicked it in the streets

jumpropes graze the sidewalk
boom box vibration
hydrants let loose
on the summer days
in the alleyways

catching a glimpse
of his dear loving gaze
letting loose our spirits
in the urban maze

Friday 23 April 2010

sugar sharp scratch of seaglass latch

Hey sweet pea! and hey, bonjour dela terre!  really miss ya. hope u got to play, hope u had some fun today? we got some time left for lights refrac-sun... in case u need some warmth, west tilts the axiom -- due east. generous we agree at the very least; degrees maximum.

all we got to do, boo -- just chew... the malleable-tungsten-filament, yumm.. tastes like coolmint, who knew? Then we bend the particle, over high fructose corn fields...to the genuine article, ya, the really high yields. BrookLlynn (not brooke shields),  B where the BookEnds. Pure sugar! like bottled coke of mexico; no pretense! mountain dew come styled retro...

Predications filled full,  like heart desires.  4 subjects tanned hands, by prayer of evening stretched parallands, now tired... There now... peaceful fold, back into night pod, where the hothot! chaud escape through cold sod... up into sky night air... forming blue tesla clouds... so i'm told.  by those who care.

those who cared? i knew they cared, oh yes i knew... i remembered how i missed u too... i knew u cared for me, i you, when particle turned to wave then wave crested... to uncut foam breaks now arrested: the trials of the sea done tested.  the sugar sharp scratch of sea glass latch, now softened to calico respite...crisscrossed & undid the fate of the desperate... by the eyes of those who care

those who stare the chill out pneumonic hearts of gold. harmonica thawed out once by his lips, then sold... who dare to care, no longer young before they grow old.... cut north from star south & afar...the chord of pronounced string theory held up before its struck, like an E minor falling flat yet unheard, (some silenced sonic radar stealth like the bats or just dumb luck). 

strung out anyway you have it, hold it, carry under duress. to extend some help because, well, there's the rest of it, etcetera, etcetera, the part we gloss over or tuck away sound, the part we cannot go under, over, around ..so we say etcetera and bless you, before the movement  finds resurgence...the feeling so critical & contagious, an emergence! we watch it, we witness, the arisen then subsidiary, the divisive separation then they remarry. the cyclical nature repeats in high drama.

they bowed and fell back, the mood grew somber...caught the wind and then tacked...went with it all, those who care...those who dare...billowed whole against the windspun squall, y'all!

Thursday 22 April 2010

sub benevolence -- or all this world she got left (for us now)

When you get to feelin like all you got is what you see in front of ya.... colored is your consciousness by visions unprecedented and last night vented in the buttery air. some demon projector she leaves ya dying on the cutting room floor.  pulling threads of nightmares straight out your head, as you sit placated by intoxicating memories, posture froze there in the chair. eyes aglow in a darkened stare.

you are wrong and amplified; right are they, the ossified. bone pale the faces all around, you thought you could trust them, pound for pound.  Got to feeling (like all your feelings) ici & here, in face of public apathy. a feeling aura untied the fix on wrong and right. the morality squirmed out of centrality. periperals sharpened into view. your mind came to rest on 'True! its True!' Your feelings are not theirs, your dreams came true to pass. Now rise up, now, they must let you past! Fast! Vite! i say, 'Time of essence, time cant last!'

Sub Benevolence colorlessness of gray, was the day. Your mind still humming under the roll of your pulse, the sure the drumming.  share how you feel may influence how they feel about your feelings you feel the mind was humming. And in a second was something coming.

What you taste in the back of your throat, in times of great &amplified, necessary movements. Sub benevolence all the while stuck in B minor. Integrated housewives polishing silver in synch. What could be finer? the chemical soup (whose recipe B corporate) they politely engage, with an oval silver and puff of sage.

Alchemy is in the air the water, in the earth --the wind.  I cannot feel nothing but goodness. Flat now concave, sharp boys who misbehave, girls on the down low, on their knees in slow-mo... only to uprise above the skirt of the table... breaking out of some generic fairytale fable. This is today, the youth of resistance! Armed with filter, set to deneutralize sub benevolence, any moment, any distance!

Meanness attacked, cruelty got jacked. The day was obscene, before obscene got obsconded. We found in this madness an offsetting sadness...effect was like primary colors turning yellow blues to green. Left some sort of restlessness...wild,....like the eyes of a child out in the streets, day break broken.

World lost focus, this one day you know. We crossed our auras: twice above, once below. The kinda sign come automatic @ sight of miracle. the sea level creatures stalked altitudes grown near me. I broke out my apple and cranberry green tea. It fell in the sea and colored it shade #3... character 4 those for whom freedom aint free. The painful enlightened morality mothers -- hides tanned by the sycamore tree. We laugh through revolution teeth! we smile off to trial!...Listening to trip hop dub mixzero - mp3.

What has this world got left for us now? trying to be normal,  trying to be sane, you lost something clearly no one can explain. like old lost cars along St Petersburg line, the czar and his family, escargots and wine. Like Polish heavyweights, 98 or 99. Crashed and burned in twenty ten. the sub benevolence humid air of conditioning. Lobbies shoving & positioning. Supermodels skinned right to the bone. Podcast marketers flood our microphone. Pharmaceuticals taken, only fade the endless drone.

No one to be trusted? please tell me im off! Sub benevolence we routed it! remember? who doubted it? get off me! fuck off! no, damn i cant believe it! just got our shit together and blazed up to sea level... who the hell are you? spiritual oppressor sent by the devil? all this world she got left is us! the gray dawn sunrise 40 degrees down, sunk to the left of us... see it there in its watery grave? up here, R we, spirits aloft,  i mean -- fine then, do it, take my body if you must, either way = SAVED!

u c us. we c u. i found him. sacre bleu. sacre coeur. mon cher.

LA VERITEE!

je taime. je te trouvais. ici dans la cite. quelle pitie. lurban rustic. bus then kick. kick rox. i b u fox. u be me tree. grounded. see? hear feel know deal. fortune chance. roll up ya pants. a little leg? its reg. normal. stat. ab. phat. kit. cat. i love you so. love you sooooo. dont u knoooooo. here to Juno. love your flow. in your tow. followin you. stalkin u. brooklyn accent. accentuated. u c me. i c u. i lost you. sacre bleu. i found u. sacre couer! je t'aime

Tuesday 13 April 2010

I missed, fully lacking, i became tormented, empty, then got full of what had been lacking before what was lacking was him or what combined with me was us...for all of us all

SUCH was a fullness of lacking, such is true! or a presence so severe and tormenting like the nightmares they drive faith, my faith to mad madness! i swear no tellin, the loud crashin' bang fly dustin' come over this, some to whirl amidst sheets put to wind or sucked dry, my my my my... and summer like fall shadows wheat field with scythe, mechanical measure of lifeless yield, held over head or over the rope are they held, those sad sucker sorrows who failed ta yeld.....the yield....crept them lifeless, took them shelled, what i feel now i even felt...sensed the animation stirring untold, chaos never quelled....truth be teld...

or whistling of moonshine bottle air through nudging sets of enamelled vanilla sky teeth, this is skinned of the mind left us bare open and purely wanderin wondering sky deep...all of us, towns of us...prairies of us....running and away, lined end up of days! often  leaving room of course for the very enemy to slip on through or in like vodka gin combination unlock the pure piss pot of ungodly sin. the exclamation lies within, my friend, the exclamation lies within, sayeth some unwelcomed private kinda voice, deep in the breast and you have no choice...deep in the bottle, under the chin. stone meets flint, flock the gulls they do again.

the unified becometh twain, the twain let a third one in, in whose belly make four, whoops, someone let up watch at the door. Five in the hive, so stirring the solution like flake assimilate and take, now holds six. sucker to fancy trick for seven. Seven such fortune to it brings, can only create, and thus spokenumeral eight. needed one more to fight the hateful hate, therefore was nine, by clear brushstroke of goddess design. sold in the market to a surprise added digit, this was ten and flexed all the rigid like a rainbow, you know, where done reap, don then sew in an extra pocket for possible clear regneration via split, so one next to one could equal the balance of the whole of it.

Git what im saying? dashed like the tongue! outdoers, tied, fit, and outdone! so a dozen makes the pan so be there no delaying! and then the baker with the generous tide! makes one extra and so confide. to only them left under the sauce unawares ya! the generous spirit sparks wet cheek tears, eh! this kind of lending of the self to another, could only engender the attraction principle, where the seventh came to table, and was found able. defying any angle or margin of error, geometry failed us all at fifteen. so we added them up and now we got sixteen! lucky my stars, when seven comes round again. on top of the pillar of one jumped to beanbag street zero, fat sucking on the fortune of every sacred drawn tarot.

Now fold......uhhhmmm.....  we fold and save all our blessings, cause counting no longer portends. what the breakthrough done broke....we broken care for....try to heal them that come after us....amends we amends amen and amen..ssssss......we mends.

Friday 2 April 2010

All will be fine (such is the case)

ALL WILL BE FINE
SUCH IS THE CASE

this is how i last
how i survive

how i overlook the useless
and focus
even dive

silent cylindical wave
merging with seas
i believe there are five

once unitively experienced
u know u arrived

i cant explain this like i said,
my words come to life and
then lie still, lie dead,
or reborn yes reborn!
in my very head

i wish for u to know
i mean u know harm
i offer white light
unfold out of self

for sight

i dare your courage
i dare to meet you
i dare your pride
i dare confide

u make me smile
i start to laugh
energetic plane
softens soft

like wax
meandering of
sax

hot hot & fine
drumbassline
trax

recorded on
a sunny california
day not long ago
when the musicians
had no mercy
said it was so

my pen was mad hot
burning like incense
my paper singed bad
situation was tense

tension held up
defining a pathway
kept my head up
day after day

i had no mercy
i moved like fire
destroying what i knew
to create in the playa

tabula rasa
nothing wasted
cuts were very hard
my passion
kept the pace

i suffered i knew
i knew not
still true

i feel all feelings
each one a clue

to the spiritual
emergency
licensed and bonded
palm cooled
rounded

henna cast vines
that wrapt round my body
what was goodness in me
met what was naughty

the effect
energy was sourced
in a system

this became the signature
which ended the divorce

brought peace to a land
knew nothin but war

an internal dynamic
shifted cells
to uncover

golden hued
sifted grains
of glass

i transformed these
eventually from
gold fronts
steeping over time

then poured rather
fast

something
revealing
cause goldface fronts
do not protect
as imagined

when you gotta
save your ass

salvation not a question
that runs through my fluid mind
it happened already
it happens all the time

just catch yourself
in your arms
when you go too near
an edge
and hang there suspended
pure mindful
oneness with ledge

see all your choices
see the divine
follow your heart...
all will be fine